—The most confusing part of this new routine is figuring out who the hell is going to actually feed me.

“Yeah, I realize we’re throwing your sleep cycle out of whack: it’s not easy getting that full 22 hours in every day.”

—Exactly, my timing is all off . . . uh, wait . . .

“Ha! Gotcha snooze hound!”

—What? What did you say?

“You heard me.”

—We’ve been conversing?

“Yes. And you started it.

—I’m sorry, but you must be mistaken. I’ve been involved in an All-Senses-Alert deep survey of the surroundings.

“Right. You might as well head back to bed: She With Whom You Abide has feeding duty today.”

—Oh, okay. I’ll go set up a command post in the bedroom.

“You do that.”