Lewis insists that there is an unwritten law that states that leftovers left on a stove automatically become the property of the household canine.

“That’s the second time in two days you’ve tried this legal baloney. What are you, some sort of legal beagle?”

—Yeah, just call me the barking shark of fictitious litigious malarkey.

“So, you admit your legal citations are feeble fictions?”

—Let’s just say I enjoy rhyme more than accuracy . . . now about those leftovers . . .