September 22, 2008

[Editor’s Note: Lewis learns that the neighbor’s Golden Retriever, Kolby, will be dropping by for a visit. Though Kolby is larger than Lewis, he still is, technically, a puppy.]

—Oh no, is that rambunctious youngster going to visit again?


—Does he have to?

“What’s wrong? Too energetic for you? You were leaping all over the place just a few minutes ago when I let you back into the house.”

—That’s different.

“How so?”

—Well, I was excited to see you and you’re about as old as I am so I knew that our levels of interaction would be commensurate.

“Puppies just don’t know when to quit?”

—Something like that . . . can’t he just stay in his cage for the evening?

“Would you like to be left in a cage? You don’t even like being left in the back yard.”

—That’s different.

“Oh really. I thought patrolling the back yard was part of your difficult job as a guard dog.”

—It is.

“And yet, lately, you often give me the sad-eye treatment when I ask you to go do your job.”

—I do not.

“Oh please.”

—The weather’s changing, it’s getting chillier.

“So, you’re a fair-weather guard dog? What good is that? Should we put up a sign that says: Beware of Dog! (When the Temperature Reaches 65 Degrees and Above.)?

—That won’t be necessary, but I’d really appreciate it if you could somehow limit Kolby’s visit.

“I don’t know . . . I think the exercise would do you good . . .”