[Editor’s Note: Aware that I’m eager to find a job, Lewis tries to leverage that knowledge to his advantage.]

—Hey, I’d hire you.

“Oh yeah?”

—Absolutely. Of course, it would help if you brought doughnuts to the interview.

“All the doughnuts are gone: we finished them yesterday.”

—You did?

“Yep. No more doughnuts in the house.”

—Oh. Well, then, forget it. You’re overqualified.