—Aren’t you forgetting something?
“What?”
—Our daily conversation.
“Oh, well you seemed pretty tired this morning so I wasn’t going to disturb you.”
—How many times do I have to explain to you that I’m not tired, I’m simply meditating in a heightened state of vigilance?
“Sorry, it’s hard for me to distinguish your snoozing from your vigilance, particularly when your legs start twitching during dreams.”
—I’m not dreaming . . . I’m . . . working through various scenarios, mentally practicing responses to various threats and situations.
“My apologies if I seemed to be suggesting otherwise.”
—Wait a minute, you’re being awfully nice . . . where’s the usual sarcasm, the crude attempts to ridicule me?
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
—Yes, you do: I’m usually a never-ending source of less-than-flattering characterizations and insinuations.
“A New Year’s resolution to be kinder to my animal friends?”
—Over two weeks late.
“Better late than never?”
—Something suspicious is going on here, and I aim to figure it out.